Wednesday, 29 May 2013

Protecting Yourselves - Social Networking and Email


please remember at *Mums World* there are NO Internet professionals. Information has been collated from reputable websites which will be listed at the end. If you are concerned, and want to report something that has happened online, you can do this by visiting the Child Exploitation and Protection Centre (CEOP) www.ceop.police.uk.

What is social networking?

Social networking is a global revolution, enabling around a billion people worldwide to stay in touch with their friends, share experiences and photographs and exchange personal content. In many ways it has replaced the telephone and email. For many users, it has become a way of life.

You may also have heard about them in the news – either in connection with child abusers making contact with young people online or young people themselves using the sites to bully and target others. However, young people can protect themselves and behave responsibly when using social networking sites – if they know how to.

Did You Know?

49% of children say that they have given out personal information; only 5% of parents/carers recognise that this may be the case*

25% of Facebook users are under the age of 10.

1/3 of 9-19 year olds who go online at least once a week report having received unwanted sexual(31%) or nasty (33%) comments via e-mail, chat, IM (instant messenger) or text message. Only 7% of parents/carers think their child have received such comments.

PERSONAL PROFILES

Personal profile pages enable people of all ages to create a webpage about themselves – and they are popular with young people and adults alike. The page can include information such as name, contact details, address and location, birthday, photo, likes and interests and also allows users to ‘post’ or upload comments about themselves onto the page.

Top Tips

If your child wants to use a social networking site, create their profile with them. You could ask them to show you how it’s done.

Make sure they understand not to post personal details such as home address, email address, mobile number, school name etc and that this information is private to them and not for sharing.

Explain that what gets put on the Internet can live forever (even if you later remove a picture it may have been copied by someone else and posted elsewhere).

Talk to your child about their username and password choice. Make sure their password cannot be easily guessed and ensure they know not to tell anyone except you what it is – even their friends.

Set Privacy Settings

Privacy settings allow people to adjust who has access to what information. So for example, you could set privacy settings to the lowest level and allow everyone to see all of the information on your personal profile. Or – and this is what we recommend, especially for young people – you should set the levels to their highest, allowing only your friends to see your profile and information.

Be aware that privacy settings can change frequently. As new applications are added to social networking sites, so are new privacy settings. So it is essential that you keep an eye on these.

Make ‘Friends’

Once a profile page has been created, the user can connect to people they know who also have a profile on the website. This ‘connection’ will mean that they can now see each other's personal information, photos and send each other messages.

Make sure that children and young people understand that ‘friends’ should be people they know, like family members or school friends. Talk to your child about how people they only meet online may not be who they say they are and that if someone they do not know wants to be their friend they should check it out with you or another trusted adult first. Remind them that they should never meet someone in person who they have only ever spoken to on the Internet.

It is not uncommon for people, including children and young people, to be contacted by people they do not know who want to be their ‘friend’.

Talk to your child about the risks involved with talking to people they do not know. 

Take an interest in their online activity and review their friends list with them from time to time.

Send Messages

Social networking sites allow users to talk to each other using an internal email or message system. This means that they can communicate privately rather than on the main profile pages.

Some social networking sites also allow you to chat instantly or in real time with someone else. See more about this in the ‘Online Chat and Instant Messaging (IM)’ section.

Top Tips

Talk to your child about receiving messages from people they do not know – or messages that make them feel uncomfortable or distressed. Let them know that it is ok for them to show you these, that you will not be cross and that you will be able to help them.

Also help them to understand that online messaging is just like writing a letter to someone and that once it is sent, you cannot take it back.

Cyberbullying

Cyberbullying is when one or more people try to tease, harass, threaten or embarrass another person using technology such as mobile phones or the Internet.

Bullying is not something that only happens in the real world any more. In the past, bullying may have occurred at school, in the playground or at a youth club, now it can happen on mobile phones, over email, in chat-rooms, on social networks and other websites. Cyberbullying can happen 24 hours a day, 365 days a year.

Children and young people can fall victim to cyberbullying, but they can also become the bully, or be drawn into cyberbullying without even realising it.

Even though cyberbullying cannot physically hurt someone – the effects can be devastating. Due to its 24/7 nature, escaping from it can be hard and victims can be left feeling very isolated, lonely, distressed, scared and vulnerable.

Top Tips

Talk to your child about responsible online behaviour

Remind them that once a message is sent or a comment is posted online you cannot take it back.

Let them know that if something bothers them, makes them feel upset, sad or scared they can talk to you about it.

Online Grooming

Grooming is a word used to describe how people who want to sexually harm children and young people get close to them, and often their families, and gain their trust. Grooming in the real world can take place in all kinds of places – in the home or local neighbourhood, the child’s school, youth and sports clubs or the church.

Online grooming may occur by people forming relationships with children and pretending to be their friend. They do this by finding out information about their potential victim and trying to establish the likelihood of the child telling. They try to find out as much as they can about the child’s family and social networks and, if they think it is ‘safe enough’, will then try to isolate their victim and may use flattery and promises of gifts, or threats and intimidation in order to achieve some control.

It is easy for ‘groomers’ to find child victims online. They generally use chatrooms which are focussed around young people’s interests. They often pretend to be younger and may even change their gender. Many give a false physical description of themselves which may bear no resemblance to their real appearance – some send pictures of other people, pretending that it is them. Groomers may also seek out potential victims by looking through personal websites such as social networking sites.

How is the grooming of children different online?

In many circumstances, grooming online is faster and anonymous and results in children trusting an online ‘friend’ more quickly than someone they had just met ‘face to face’. Those intent on sexually harming children can easily access information about them and they are able to hide their true identity, age and gender. People who groom children may not be restricted by time or accessibility to a child as they would be in the ‘real world’.

What is sexting?

Most young people today are entirely comfortable with recording their entire lives online – much like other generations used to do in a diary.

These days though, this often includes uploading and sharing photos, status messages on what has been happening in their lives or how they are feeling, and texting back and for. While this ‘finger on the pulse, share all’ culture has some benefits, it can also create an environment in which teenagers and young people make impulsive decisions without thinking through the possible consequences. Often times, they are only a click away from doing something digitally that they would not normally do in the real world.

Sexting generally refers to the sending of sexually explicit images via text, email, MSN or through social networking sites. For example, this could be a picture of a boy or young man exposing himself or a young woman in a state of undress.

There could be many reasons why young people would want to take these sorts of pictures and send them to someone else. It could be that two young people who are in a relationship want to prove their love or commitment to each other; it could be that someone is looking to start a relationship with someone else or it could be that they simply want to show off.

While sending sexually explicit messages or pictures carries enough problems of its own, it can have real consequences if the content is shared with others – either by people forwarding it on using messages or emails or by uploading it onto a social networking site or website. This could result in immediate consequences, possibly within the school environment, or more serious consequences for later in life such as if a prospective college, university or employer were to see it.

Top Tips:

Talk to your children about sexting and the consequences - don’t wait for something to happen. We know it isn’t always easy to talk about sex, dating and relationships with teenagers – but it is better to talk about these issues before something happens.

Remind your children that once an image is sent, there is no getting it back. Stress to your child that once they have sent an image, or posted it online, they no longer have control of it and it could end up anywhere. Ask them how they would feel if their teachers, parents, or their whole school saw what they had sent.

Address peer pressure. Peer pressure can be a formidable force so make sure your child knows that you understand that they could be pushed into sending something. Talk to them about making positive decisions and be sure they understand that no matter how great the pressure becomes, the potential social humiliation could be a hundred times worse. Also let them know that they can talk to you about this pressure and how they can go about dealing with it.

Make sure they take responsibility. Make sure your child understands that they are responsible for their actions. That includes what they choose to do if they receive a sexually explicit photo. Have them understand that if they do receive one, they need to delete it immediately. Tell them that if they do send it on, they're distributing pornography -- and that they could get into trouble with the police.

Keep your children safe online

Teach your children the five key Childnet SMART rules which remind young people to be SMART online. You should go through these tips with your children.

S – SAFE Keep safe by being careful not to give out personal information – such as your name, email, phone number, home address, or school name – to people who you don’t know online.

M – MEETING Meeting someone you have only been in touch with online can be dangerous. Only do so with your parents’/carers’ permissions & when they can be present.

A – ACCEPTING Accepting e-mails, IM messages or opening files from people you don’t know or trust can be dangerous – they may contain viruses or nasty messages.

R – RELIABLE Someone online may be lying about who they are, and information you find on the internet may not be reliable.

T – TELL Your parent, carer or a trusted adult if someone or something makes you feel uncomfortable or worried.

Keep interested in their online activity by asking questions about what they are doing, what their friends are doing and if they have made any new ones. You should ask to see their profile now and again, and those of their friends, and if they are sharing pictures or writing a blog you can review these together. Also, check out the privacy settings from time to time to ensure they are set appropriately.

Remind your child that if anything happens that makes them feel uncomfortable or scared, they can talk to you about it, you wont get cross and you can help them.

Thank you for joining us tonight. We hope it has raised awareness to the potential dangers that can accrue via the use of Social Networking. If you have any concerns, or would like to know more, please visit the websites used in tonights topuc by clicking on the link below.

http://www.parentsprotect.co.uk/social_networking.htm


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