Sleep problems

If your child won’t go to bed

• Decide what time you want your child to go to bed.
• Close to the time that your child normally falls asleep, start a 20-minute ‘winding down’ bedtime routine. Bring this forward by 5-10 minutes a week (or 15 minutes, if your child is in the habit of going to bed very late) until you get to the bedtime you want.
• Set a limit on how much time you spend with your child when you put them to bed. For example, read only one story, then tuck your child in and say goodnight.
• Give your child their favourite toy, dummy (if they use one) or comforter before settling into bed.
• If your child cries, leave them for 5-10 minutes before going back in and settling them down again.
• Don’t pick them up or take them downstairs. If your child gets up, put them back to bed again.
• Leave a drink of water within reach and a dim light on if necessary.
• If you keep checking to see if your child is asleep, you might wake them up, so leave it until you're certain that they're asleep.
• You might have to repeat this routine for several nights.
• If you try this, you will need to try to be firm and not give in.

If you child keeps waking during the night
By the time your child is six months old, it’s reasonable to expect them to sleep through most nights. However, up to half of all children under five go through periods of night waking. Some will just go back to sleep on their own; others will cry or want company. If this happens, try to work out why your child is waking up.
For example:

• Is it hunger? If your child is a year or older, some cereal and milk last thing at night might help them to sleep through the night.
• Are they afraid of the dark? You could use a nightlight or leave a landing light on.
• Is your child waking up because of night fears or bad dreams? If so, try to find out if something is bothering them.
• Is your child too hot or too cold? Adjust their bedclothes or the heating in the room and see if that helps.

If there’s no obvious cause, and your child continues to wake up, cry or demand company, you could try some of the following suggestions:

• Scheduled waking. If your child wakes up at the same time every night, try waking them 15-60 minutes before this time, then settling them back to sleep.
• Let your child sleep in the same room as a brother or sister. If you think your child may be lonely, and their brother or sister doesn’t object, put them in the same room. This can help them both sleep through the night.
• Teach your child to get back to sleep by themselves. First check that everything is alright. If it is, settle your child down without talking to them too much. If they want a drink, give them water but don’t give them anything to eat. For this approach to work, you need to leave them in their cot or bed. Don't take them downstairs or into your bed. Let them cry for around 5-10 minutes before you check on them. Over the next few nights, gradually increase the amount of time you leave them before checking. It might take a week or two but if you keep the routine going, your child should start falling asleep on their own.
• Tackle it together. If you have a partner, agree between you how to tackle your child’s sleeping problems. You don’t want to try to decide what to do in the middle of the night. If you've both agreed what's best for your child, it’ll be easier to stick to your plan.